Bathtime (chat with cat)

Brother MBrother M, Cat Chats 3 Comments

CAT: “Why are you sitting in that big ocean thing?”

ME: “It’s not an ocean it’s a bathtub”

CAT: “You look weird without fur”

ME: “You mean clothes?”

CAT: “I know what I mean, why aren’t you getting me food?

ME: “You don’t need food, you are fat”

CAT: “I am not fat! I am big boned! Besides that’s the teapot calling the saucepan brown”.

ME: “What?”

CAT: “It’s a cat saying”

ME: “What ever fur face”

CAT: “So why are you in the ocean thing again?”

ME: “BATHTUB”

CAT: “Whatever”

ME: “My butt and my toe hurts”

CAT: “Maybe you should stop sticking your toe up your butt?”

ME: “I AM NOT sticking my toe up my butt! They are two separate conditions!” /mumble besides I am not flexible enough.

CAT: “It is that Brad bloke? You are always talking about his butt”

ME: “Lies! We are just mates.”

CAT: “So why is your butt sore?”

ME: “*sigh* It’s a medical condition.”

CAT: “Why don’t you just lick it it works for me.”

ME: “Yes and I WISH you would stop licking my face after.”

CAT: “Stoopid humans, where is my food?”

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